Indian Bartender: oh, God, what do I know? I'm a half Punjabi Sikh Tamil separatist. My sister's married a Jewish doctor from New Jersey and our other grandmother was an Irish nun who left me this bar... which is a very long story...

Father Brian: So...you're a Sikh Catholic Muslim with Jewish in-laws??

Indian Bartender: Yes, Yes! It is VERY complicated!

"Keeping the Faith"