Wednesday, August 5, 2009

ebook humor

Chivalry

I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out
your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes
to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat
me at mario kart
from Texts from last night


Friday, July 24, 2009

Don't know why I have this running through my head..

Group:
God, I hope I get it, I hope I get it!
How many people does he need? How many people does he need?
God, I hope I get it! I hope I get it!
How may boys, how many girls How many boys, how many...
Look at all the people, at all the people
How many people does he need? How many boys, how many girls?
How many people does he ...

Tricia
I really need this job.
Please, God, I need this job.
I've got to get this job.

Group:
God, I really blew it,
I really blew it!
How could I do a thing like that?

Boys:
How could I do a thing like ...?

Group:
Now, I'll never make it. I'll never make it!
He doesn't like the way I look.
He doesn't like the way I dance.
He doesn't like the way I...
http://www.lyricsmania.com/lyrics/a_chorus_line_lyrics_16888/other_lyrics_47649/i_hope_i_get_it_lyrics_512125.html

Bill Mahar on capitalism

How about this for a New Rule: Not everything in America has to make a
profit. It used to be that there were some services and institutions so
vital to our nation that they were exempt from market pressures. Some
things we just didn't do for money. The United States always defined
capitalism, but it didn't used to define us. But now it's becoming all that
we are.
Huffington Post



Ain’t That a Shame

from http://justinelarbalestier.com/blog/2009/07/23/aint-that-a-shame/

In the last few weeks as people have started reading the US ARC of Liar they have also started asking why there is such a mismatch between how Micah describes herself and the cover image. Micah is black with nappy hair which she wears natural and short. As you can see that description does not match the US cover.

Many people have been asking me how I feel about the US cover, why I allowed such a cover to appear on a book of mine, and why I haven’t been speaking out about it.


Monday, July 13, 2009

WARNING!



If you push the bin against the elevator door while going down, this might happen to you.

via http://www.cynical-c.com/?p=13694

Monday, July 6, 2009

Paula Poundstone

Just gave my dog a flea shower, which is where, when you know she's going to have fleas, friends bring little blankets and outfits for them.
http://twitter.com/paulapoundstone/status/2501329329



Friday, June 26, 2009

Saturday, June 20, 2009

from Overheard in New York

Large, intimidating thug: So you think you're grown up, huh? You think you're a man?
Small boy: (nods)
Large, intimidating thug: Then why don't you get a job? Move out?
Small boy: Cause I love you!
Large, intimidating thug, more quietly: Well, I love you too.

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com




Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Trouble Ticket

**April 29, 2009 2:06:25 PM Marc**
Client has a gel pad type device that he requires assistance in setting up.
Please provide onsite assistance for the client.

Client has requested to have an email sent to him to
schedule a time to resolve the request.

**May 1, 2009 8:05:21 AM Sally**
on my way to 2sc, I will see if he is at his desk.

**May 1, 2009 9:31:12 AM Sally**
device was a gell mouse pad. I took it out of the package
and placed it on the desk.

### Ticket Closed May 1, 2009 9:31:12



Monday, June 15, 2009

quote of the day

from @howardweaver

One wolf is evil: anger, jealousy, greed, pride, ego. Another is good: joy, hope, serenity, humility. Which wolf wins? The one you feed.





Thursday, June 4, 2009

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

TFLN

I can only speak casual parseltoungue, I'm not bad though. Just the general, "Where's the bathroom?" "Open the chamber of secrets", that type of stuff.
http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/view/47366

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Overheard in New York

Teen girl #1: I think you should just jump him.
Teen girl #2: I tried. It's a complicated situation.
Teen girl #1: How's that?
Teen girl #2: Well, I told him that I was bored and home alone...
Teen girl #1: And?
Teen girl #2: And he told me he was busy watching Star Trek.
--Alice's Tea Cup

Monday, June 1, 2009

Quote of the day

Israeli Government Press Director Daniel Seamen reacted to the Obama administration statement by saying: "I have to admire the residents of Iroquois territory for assuming that they have a right to determine where Jews should live in Jerusalem."
http://bit.ly/DQ0ir


Friday, May 8, 2009

flying with your peanut






Very cute ad campaign... Nuts About Southwest

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Saturday, April 25, 2009

quote of the day

It's sad what's happened to the Republicans. They used to be the party of the big tent; now they're the party of the sideshow attraction, a socially awkward group of mostly white people who speak a language only they understand. Like Trekkies, but paranoid.

http://www.latimes.com/news/opinion/commentary/la-oe-maher24-2009apr24,0,6983740.story


Tuesday, April 21, 2009

BAD Fark Headline of the day... BAD FARK, BAD!

"Stephen Hawking expected to make a full recovery. Well, not a "full" recovery, per se, but you get the point"




Sunday, April 19, 2009

Tripods are for wimps...



ok... where this is concerned, I'm a wimp...

from gizmodo...



Thursday, April 16, 2009

"Overheard in New York" of the day

That Jerk Never Returns My Calls

Girl #1: This whole Ben situation is really starting to piss me off.
Girl #2: I know! I just don't know what his deal is.
Girl #1: He called me like twelve times yesterday.
Girl #2 (stopping in the middle of Penn Station): He called you? (pauses for a moment) Oh, you mean Ben your boyfriend, don't you?
Girl #1: As opposed to?
Girl #2: Ben from Lost.
Girl #1: Don't talk to me for an hour, please.

http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/



Monday, April 13, 2009

tweenbots

from boingboing
Tweenbots are are simple robots bearing a flag with their destinations.
Random humans they encounter in the street have to pick them up and aim them in the right direction.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

New toy

Got a new toy last night... time to move up from the 250.






Saturday, April 11, 2009

found on the interwebtubes... somewhere...



I just liked it...



Friday, April 10, 2009

FARK headline of the day

Snake venom is being marketed as the new budget alternative to botox, just in case cost was the main factor stopping you from injecting one of the world's deadliest toxins into your face




Tuesday, April 7, 2009

QUote of the day

"The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off."
-Gloria Steinem


Friday, April 3, 2009

"Girls need things fixed"



There seems to be some discussion over whether this was supposed to be tongue-in-cheek or not.

from http://contexts.org/socimages/2009/04/02/boys-fix-things-girls-need-things-fixed/


Thursday, April 2, 2009

Is the President a copyright crook?

President Obama reportedly gave an iPod, loaded with 40 show tunes, to England's Queen Elizabeth II as a gift. Did he violate the law when he did so?

You know your copyright laws are broken when there is no easy answer to this question.

Handy ToDo List

found on Tumblr...





Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Invalid Entry message



ummmmmm... OK...




A friendly converstaion








Quote of the day

"There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs."


Overheard on Twitter

One thing I love about Merced is the surprising regularity that I hear the word "sheep" on the police scanner.


Fark Headlines of the day

"Canadian cops can't figure out why someone would
steal five tractor trailers full of Pepsi, but they double the guard at
local Mentos warehouse just to be safe"

Monday, March 30, 2009

Happy Anniversary

On today's date, 1858, Hymen Lipman was granted a patent for attaching a piece of rubber to the end of a pencil. While it was certainly a stroke of genius, the courts didn't think it to be as groundbreaking as one might think. From Smithsonian:

Unfortunately for Lipman, the patent would later be revoked, when the U.S. Supreme Court rules in 1875 that a pencil with an eraser is just a pencil with an eraser and not a new invention.

Smithsonian


Mac mod of the day

No idea where the design comes from... just clever..


Thursday, March 26, 2009

my newest desk accessory.

Scratch, ( from http://pvponline.com )
How come, in department stores, their idea of desk accessories is so very different from mine?







Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Quote of the day:

"Don't lead your life in quiet desperation and go to the grave with your song still in you."

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

an honest conversation



quote of the day

"He’s always asking: 'Is that new? I haven't seen that before.'
It’s like,
'Why don't you mind your own business? Solve world hunger. Get out of my closet.'"
- Michelle Obama, on dodging her husband's inquiries about her shopping